Desperately Confused!

Ciao bloggers! Finally I logged in to this site anymore. I really miss youuuuuuu my blooooooog!!!! {} Uhm, how r y guys? I'm feeling desperate ryt nowww. I just stalked my friends blog. Why they have an awesome background and header??? Look at mine! It's kinda disgusting and sooo 20s!!!!  щ(‾ Д ‾ щ) (emote agak aneh akibat gak kebaca -_-) Okay! Wait for me till I have time to change and make-up everything on my blog. Soon! (ʃƪ˘˘ﻬ)♥

We Should Be Together, Idiot.

Cinta Lama Belum Kelar. LOL. This isn't a funny story. It was so sad :"

"Love is...trying to be happy for them,

even how much it hurts knowing they can't be with you."

I previously had a boyfriend when I'm on the 2nd grade Junior High School. His name is Andre. He is super dumb and kinda annoying sometime. Did I love him? Haha I don't even know -_- but then, because of something that I couldn't mention (because I've forgot why), we broke up. Just like that. I'm not even sad till crying because a broken-hearted. I feel so usual. Like nothing's happened. Hahaha.

I got a boyfriend again a year later. Broke up again. Until I reach my Senior High School, I met him again in the same school in the middle of the first period. I don't even care he is there. But then, one year after that, I mean in the last August, I broke up with my boyfriend, and getting closer again with Andre. This is because his friends told me he loved me again and regret about the mistakes he'd done to me 3 years ago. So, just like that. Each day, we're getting closer and closer. Until 4 days ago. The day it ended. I asked him why he's seem so freaking different from the first time he said that he loves me. He told me that we never met up at school (you know what, it just because you never come to school and too busy with your friends, jerk!). Hah, lame reasons. I just agreed it "Okay, fine. Don't worry about me. We still friend yeah? Okay, take care of yourself. Don't forget to go to church."

I miss you until now, Idiot. As you know (if you have a Twitter account, you'll understand, maybe) I twitted anything about you. I know, I'm pathetic. Yaaa, you may laughing now. No problem. We've through the days for 16 days. I called it "Love for 16 days" my sad love story ended pathetic. Oyaa, yesterday should be our first date, ndre. Don't you remember it?

I've tried so many times to forget you. My ex-boy try to calm me down, so do my besties. I tried not to re-read our last conversation, but my hands are too stupid to do it. I tried too, not to fall my tears, but I can't. My brain screams "I CAN!!" but my heart says "YOU STILL CARE, STUPID!" Oh God. What's wrong with me? Am I as idiot as him? Please God. I just want to do this letting-go-process as easy as I thought. I am a tough girl. I'm sure I can do this shit. But I've tried anything to forget him, still, It's not working.

"When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead

you can look beside you and your best friend will be there."